Dusk or Dawn

September 30, 2019

The earlier I get up, the more energized I feel. I perfectly know I’m a morning person because that’s the way I’ve always been, but I’m still not acting upon this fact. I go out late at night, sometimes until the crack of dawn, and consequently, I wake up late. Then I feel sluggish and I wonder why.

There is something that attracts me about the dark, the city lights, and the people sharing the ambient warmth. It’s an ephemeral yet joyful world. If I gave in to my desires, I would just stay up all night and sleep from 10 AM to 6 PM. That’s not what my body requires, however.

I always find those paradoxes to be fascinating. It’s traditionally assumed it’s best to follow the sun because we are diurnal animals and it’s been proven that people working a night shift are more likely to develop health issues, but what about outliers? When I lived in Stockholm, I couldn’t help but becoming a night owl during the long and dark winters. You can’t just live on six hours of daylight time.

The call of the heart, or the call of reason. Dusk, or dawn. How can I reconcile both? I wish I didn’t need to sleep. In the meantime, I’ll have to make a choice.